Mikey (neomikey) wrote,

Valentine's Day sucks! :D

Yeah, I hate Valentine's Day. It just makes single people feel bad, and gives higher expectations for a day to those who have somebody. So, to make up for it, read a short story I wrote for my friend Erin's journal, when she asked her friends to write a Valentine's Day story/tall tale about how you "met your significant other"...even if you don't have one.

Yeah, I know...I've apparently got illusions of grandeur.


It was Valentine's Day, and I drove down the road in my B.M.W. with the "Pizza Hut" sign on top of my car. It was another day, another check. This fellow had ordered from the edge of our delivering area, and I was the lucky son-of-a-gun to go deliver him the pizza. It was just a medium pizza...nothing big. It was a routine delivery.

I drove up to the docks and found my way over to warehouse 23. I stepped out of my car with the pizza case in my hand, and walked up to the door...a tiny thing when contrasted to the tall aluminum siding walls of the place. I knocked a couple times, and got no response. I waited a little, then tried again. I heard the coming footsteps on concrete echoing inside, then a stone-faced gentleman wearing a business suit answered the door, his dark sunglasses hiding most of his features.

I smiled at him, giving a curt "hello". "Step inside," was all he said, then turned around and walked back into interior. I hesitated a moment, looking inside, then stepped in, just beyond the door. The inside was gigantic, but it was mostly empty. There was a small room off to the side with only one window, a dirty yellow light coming out of it. Not far from that was a black limousine parked, with a table set up next to it, and a host of rich-looking folks all around it, blocking my view to what was on it.

They were murmuring amongst themselves, oblivious to my presence. Then, the door to the room opened, and a man with slicked-back blonde hair, a bright white silk shirt under a black trench coat, dark pants, and alligator skin boots came. He clapped his hands together and rubbed them as he approached. "Everybody! Welcome, welcome," he started in a foreign accent. "I am glad to see you all could make it! As you all know, the American government has been cracking down on us lately. They will not let us share our 'product' openely with their populace of lemmings."

This got a response of people murmuring their agreement with him. "So, I asked myself...'what...could we do to make sure of this?' We could try to remain undercover...but no, no, America is always snooping in our business. So my resolution, gentlemen...." He then casually walked to the limousine and popped the trunk, reaching in, and pulling out one of the biggest guns I had ever seen, something sterling silver with various barrels sticking out the front, some laser pointing attachment on the top, and some electronic dials on the side. "...is to fight...the government."

This conversation was disturbing me, while at the same time piquing my interest. I started slowly meandering over, still carrying the pizza pouch, while the man continued to speak. "I call it 'Ragnarok'...the 'sword that will end the world'. This, gentlemen, fires off various types of rounds. While it employs your basic nine-millimeter ammo, it also can use explosive rounds and even an assortment of miniature rock--"

He stopped talking as his eye caught the man clad in red holding a pizza, and he slowly put the gun onto the table. "What're you doing here?" he asked flatly.

"'Ey boss, come on," one of the suits spoke up. "We had to wait for you for awhile, an' we got hungry!"

With his hands on top of the table, he whirled around and peered at the man, a wild look in his eyes. "Shut up! Nobody uninvited was supposed to be here! Nobody uninvited!" He then looked back towards me glowering. "Just take care of him."

Two of the men gathered around the table looked at each other a moment, then shrugged and started walking towards me, one on each side. The one on the left put his hand on my shoulder. "All right, we don' want no tr--"

I took the pizza and its pounch, and slammed its side right into his face, knocking him off balance, followed by an immediate side kick to the gut. The other man rushed at me, and I took the pizza and threw it at his head. He caught it, but at the same time caught a fist to the gut, followed by a hard elbow down to his neck as he doubled over.

"Get him!!" the leader barked. All the men started running at me, and I immediately charged back in kind. I jumped and made sure my heel rammed straight into one man's face, as I then used him as leverage to jump off and spin kick another one right in the head, immediately keeling him over, and landing myself by the table. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a man pull a gun. I threw the table over, spilling a large amount of white powder off it, while the large gun clattered next to me behind it.

I heard the gunshots ring out, as a few pierced my shield of a table, barely missing me. For a moment I fretted about how I would get out, as I then realized the solution was right at my feet. I grabbed the so-called "Ragnarok" gun, then stood up, pulling a large trigger, as suddenly my body was rocked as it fired its shells at my assailants. When they saw I had the gun, they all scattered, some trying to duck for cover.

I looked around for an exit--the closest one was above that room with the one window. The stairs were too far away; I imagined I could probably reach it if I climbed on top of the limo and tried jumping up to there. I started running as I heard more gunshots being fired at me. I made it to the limo, then jumped backwards, sliding across the hood backwards while letting loose more shots at them. The gun bumped on the hood, and caused it to make a quick "beep" sound. I ignored it, while clammering my way up the windshield across the roof, trying to make it to the top of the room.

They didn't stop firing at me. I gasped as I suddenly felt a bullet pierce through my shoulder. I knelt on the roof a moment, gripping the wound, then turned around and pulled the gun's trigger again. Suddenly, a rocket fired from it, screeching across the warehouse and exploding as it hit the warehouse wall on the other side. I blinked, amazed that it could do that, then threw the gun on the top of the room, and with my uninjured arm got myself up.

I grabbed the gun as soon as I was up there, and let another rocket fly at my pursuers. This one flew awkwardly, and hit the limousine, making it explode in a bright orange fireball. It knocked me back, causing me to suddenly lose my balance, and fall through a skylight in the room I hadn't noticed before. Glass shattered all around me, as I plummetted down, my fall only being broken by a table beneath.

The single dirty light bulb in the room swung feverishly as it was rocked by the explosion, casting odd moving shadows about the room. I coughed, the unsettled dust making it hard to breathe for a moment. As the confusion slowly cleared up, I noticed I wasn't alone. In a chair near the back was a dark-haired girl tied to a chair and gagged. Our eyes met, hers were panicked in fear while mine showed I still wondered what was going on.

I got myself up, and slowly started towards her. "It's all right," I began. "I'm not going to hurt you." She blinked, realizing the "good guy" was here. I knelt next to her chair and unbound the gag from her mouth, then started undoing the ropes. "Are...you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine," she said, her voice shaking. "These...these are horrible men! They kidnapped me, and tied me up, hoping to get ransom money from my rich father! They have to be stopped!"

"Don't worry, they'll...somehow get stopped, I'm sure," I said reassuringly. "I didn't really expect to run into them when I came here. I only thought I would bring them pizza...."

"Pizza?" she asked, confused. "Are...you an undercover agent, posing as a pizza driver?"

I wasn't sure how to respond to that, so I scratched the back of my head, looking away. "Well, uh...not really. I've just seen too many Jet Li and Schwarzenegger movies...."

The girl chuckled at that, as the last of her ropes came off, and she brought her wrist around, massaging at it, trying to get the feeling back. She then looked at me, her eyes staring into mine. "What's your name?"

"My name..." I trailed off. For the moment, it should be something impressive. Something to let her know she's with a real-life action hero. I looked back at her smiling, then gave her a wink. "My name's Valentine."

"Valentine..." she quietly repeated. Outside, over the crackling of flames from the burning limo, we heard shouts. It sounded like we were about to get company again. I looked at her, now a bit nervous. "I don't think we're going to get out of here alive..." I said to her.

She didn't take that, though. She stood up, walking across the room to a cabinet, then opened it, and reached inside. She pulled out two pistols, one in each hand, and cocked them to the ready. She looked at me and smiled slyly. She grabbed another gun from the cabinet, then walked over and gave it to me. "If we get out of here alive, my Valentine...would you treat me to pizza?"

I held her gaze and slowly nodded, a smirk coming across my face. "It would be my pleasure." She abruptly brought her hands around my head, and brought me forward, meeting me in a deep kiss. We held there...I don't know how long. When we ended, I got my breath back, then looked back at her. "That was...the best tip I've ever received."

Outside we heard somebody fast approaching the door. She looked at me, and I looked at her. "You ready?" I nodded. We brandished our weapons, then ran for the door, ready to fight for our lives...and maybe each other as well.
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