Mikey (neomikey) wrote,

I'd like to write in my LiveJournal when I'm happy. I really would. But lately, it seems almost like only bad circumstances are prompting to write stuff in here.

Right now Mom is vacationing with her caretaker in Elko, Nevada. When she left, she was pretty sad. Also, she said that, with Dad and I not being able to be here all the time, and also with her handicap, she isn't able to take care of the dogs, and we might have to get rid of them. "Make a choice", is what she said about it. Also, I have a feeiing Dad is leaning more and more towards Mom being put into some sort of care. I feel bad for Mom all the time, because most of the time she is sitting at home in the living room, watching tv...and that's all she ever does, because that's all she's capable of, and she's said many a time she's grown tired of it long ago.

Tonight, when I came home from work, Dad informed me that right now Grandma is in the hospital. "She's taken a turn for th worse," is what he said. This honestly scares me very, very much. Last few times I've heard this expression about a grandparent, they've passed away. My grandma, on my dad's side (Daniels), is the only grandparent I have left...and actually lately it has been on my mind her current state of health. Dad told me he can tell her mind is slowly starting to slip. Her birthday is this Saturday too...but I planned to visit a friend during that time (Jafax with Jenna). I want to do something big for Grandma before then, I want her to know that I love her very, very much. I want her to get better. ...and I don't want her condition to worsen, because this is the very same situation that happened with my now-deceased grandpas....

Lately my lot in life has seemed lighter, ever since my chance encounter with Joe S.B. It was great to know that there really are people in the area that are able to see people for who they really are, and can appreciate them. Also, at the moment, I'm housesitting...two places at once, really. I'm housesitting at Nick's place while he's in Ohio, and also I'm taking care of the Price's residence while they make a family roadtrip all the way up to New York. After I'm finished with this entry, I plan to drive to the Price's, possibly to spend the night there, after I finish taking care of their cat. It's hard to believe that it was almost a year ago that they left me to housesit while they went on their last family trip, and that was the second entry of my LiveJournal. I never thought about my LiveJournal actually having a birthday...but I suppose it's going to come up next month. I remember when this was just something Erin recommended to me, and helped me to get started.

I suppose I'm being needlessly sentimental about that. Anyways, my computer is fritzing out again. I might have been on the computer all night, but my computer was walking with a limp. Program after program spontaneously shorted out. I didn't even get to talk on MSN (sorry, Biccy...!). Lately an unexpected friend has been found with a fellow named "Reznik" whom I met on WinMX, who always thought me to be annoying. Now, he's offering computer advice, and is going these extra miles to help me out. It's pretty unexpected. But even so, my computer's diagnosis is still the same--nothing has gotten better on here. After I get my things backed up onto CD's finally, I might very well format the thing. It would be a shame, but I'm so far not seeing alternatives to getting this fixed, unless Microsoft comes back and tells me the status of that error report thing I sent out to them...but...you probably lost track of what I'm talking about, so I'll move on.

Lately it seems like everybody has been walking around with a heavy heart. Just about everybody I know or whose journal I read have been having problems, and I really do mean everybody's journals. I'm feeling for you all, and my heart goes out to each and every one of you, though I haven't said anything in your journals. From parental problems, to being in a stuck rut with life, to feelings of loneliness and confusion, to Gaia Online being distorted, to other woes, great and small. It seems like life sometimes just goes from some people being bad to everybody being bad. I hope I'm not overgeneralizing, but it really does feel this way to me.

Also, I was supposed to get a hold of Steph, but I've had virtually no free time the past few days...at least time that's socially acceptable to call. Daggumit, why does Instant Messenger have to be down for me? >_< Right now all I can see with my life is that there is no easy solutions or easy ways out. The only way out is to go through this head first, and help those who need it. I don't like making these depressing entries...but this's the only place I have at the moment to get all my thoughts down (Magen, Biccy, I really don't purposely write so much!). I'm hoping to have some good news come next entry, which I'm determined to make soon.

For those who pray, my family really needs it right now.
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