Mikey (neomikey) wrote,

I freaking hate you, Valentine's Day.

Anybody who's kept up with my journal knows that love is a very, very sore subject for me. You've mostly all heard me tell my story (or lack, thereof) before, so I'm not going to rehash it at all. But when there's a day celebrating ooey-gooey, in-your-face, mooshy love, which is everything that enrages me and makes me want to kill, this is just a day that has no meaning to me, other than feeling angry.

This morning, though, it was cold, dark, cloudy, and raining. That made me smile. :) Later on, though, I saw a funeral passing through. That didn't. While I hate people smashing lovey-dovey crap in my face and being apathetic to what I have to say about it, I don't want the day ruined for others. There are people in the world who do have a genuine love for each other, and they should have a day set aside where they appreciate each other.

Last year, I talked to my one and only ex, Jessica, before Valentine's Day. For those who might not know, the relationship lasted six days, and I was a terrible boyfriend, so I don't really count that as "relationship". But anyways, we were talking, and we both expressed our dissatisfaction for this Hallmark holiday. So, on Valentine's Day, I went to her house, gave her a flower I picked up at some stall, a 2-liter of Mountain Dew Livewire, and asked her if she would be my "Valentine's Day sucks, and people in love should express their feelings for each other all the time, instead of just one day, and at the same time it makes single people feel bad" Valentine. She gave a big smile and said, "Awwwwwwww!!" I then flailed, and told her it wasn't supposed to be "awwwwww", but rather just saying that this day sucks, but she's not alone in hating it!

Today while I was out delivering pizzas, I saw a bumper sticker. It said "My wife says I never listen to her...or something like that". Not long ago, I was hanging out with Nick and a couple others. At one point, his friend Eric gets a cell phone call. It's his wife. He just ignores it, and says that she's annoying, and likely checking up on him, because he wasn't home when he said he was going to be. I said that wasn't too kind, at which point Nick made the comment that he could tell I've "never been in a serious relationship before". Now, I like love...I really do. Love is something the world honestly needs more of. But if I were to fall in love, I'd want to take care and cherish that woman with all that I was able. Falling in love isn't something that happens every day, and when you find that person, they just...I don't know. I don't know where I was going with that.

It just gets me that there are people out there who don't appreciate what they have, while there are others who never, ever have been loved in their lives, and would cherish that other person in a non-creepy/annoying way, but they're always overlooked by good people or everyone they'd be interested in is taken. I sometimes wonder if the world would be a better place without such a thing as "Valentine's Day" (Sweetest Day can just freaking die), and the answer is an optimistc "maybe". It's true that love is celebrated on this day, but you have to realize not everybody can do this. There is nothing for me to celebrate on this day--not even a past experience or relationship. And while I might be an extreme case in that matter, for those who are single, I never hear a positive/happy comment about this day, other than "I try to be happy for those with somebody". In the past, I'd try and give small non-relationship-hinting gifts to female friends...but I've given up on that since then.

Anyways, in conclusion, I don't like Valentine's Day, and if you try and parade any sappy junk in my face, while people know me to be somebody very patient, I will sock you in your face. And it will be hard.
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